It's been a while since I posted. Confronting breast cancer is one of many reasons why. On September 2nd, 2021 I had the cancer removed from my left breast. I'm lucky that it was small (6mm), slow growing and "well-behaved" and that all was removed with no questions remaining. I was one in every 8 women that get breast cancer in the US. Shocking statistics! This all has been, at times, overwhelming. I was out of it from the anesthesia for several days after my out patient 'Twilight Sleep' surgery. My incision healed well but has left me with a 3 to 4 inch scar to remind me of the day. I no longer match my early nude photos here. Lots of changes before that too, as age will do. The 'cancer medical machine' helped me and was also part of what overwhelmed me. Happily I've been lifted up by friends and loving healers that lead me to decide not to continue any treatment. None of those friends or healers told me what to do. I chose. The well-behaved nature of my cancer makes me comfortable with my decision. I know I am very lucky in the type of cancer that showed up and for that I'm deeply grateful!
This has been a pivotal experience that's made me look at my life and make a few new choices. Here's part of my October newsletter to share some of my process. Sending you love as you move through your days!
Saying goodbye to Sofie
A Little Osho Wisdom
All these waves of emotion and my recent wants and fears have once again shown how discontent I am. My busy mind is very good at finding ways to be miserable. I thought I'd share some Osho wisdom that kicked my ass:
Monday evenings are precious to me since beginning my All Love Zoom. The gatherings open my heart and fill me with deep peace. The sweet connection between those who gather makes my week! I hope you will join us. Drop me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org for the link!
I love Abraham Hicks's question, "Are you enjoying your contrasts?" I have been riding through a bunch recently. Life is all about contrast. I'm still working with being with what is as I restart my 'meditation practice'. I have spent the last years stopping briefly and becoming present tasting momentary stillness and peace with only occasional long meditations. I intend to begin my daily sitting again to stop my "monkey mind" from its amazingly creative dramas. It amazes me how I still run away from the very thing that brings me Bliss. WTF?
On the embodied front, I begin a medication soon to keep cancer from returning. I'm very lucky to not have to do radiation or Chemo. I wanted to just believe it was gone for good after surgery but that isn't how cancer works, apparently. This has been hard for me to accept. Hopefully this new medication will be healthy for my body. Prayers welcome, Beloveds!
Thank you for reading my newsletter to the end and riding along with me in my ups and downs recently. I'd love to hear from you about your journeys and if any of my confessions and realizations ring a bell for you. Have a wonderful October and remember to be kind to yourself!
Love and Blessings Always,
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